Birthday Wishes

I'm not sure what she wished for, but she got three cupcakes out of the deal.

Three!!

My darling girl is three years old today. I know that every single parent says it at every single birthday, but how did that happen? How have three years passed since she came into our world? She was just my tiny little bean and now she is a KID. She walks, she talks, she opines, LOUDLY. We have our highs and lows but every day with her is an adventure.

And now after more than one thousand glorious days of on the job training, I think it is safe to claim to be an expert on child-rearing.

Just a few of my pearls of wisdom:

1. Potty training is more art than science.

2. I don't care how many experts say that you can get your kid to eat anything. Accept that you will never understand your child's culinary choices.

3. Sleeping in? Fuhgeddaboudit.

4. Clothes will be changed a minimum of five times a day.

5. Related to #4: seasons, weather and temperature have no bearing on clothing selections.

6. Tantrums happen only at the very worst times. Like in the middle of the painfully quiet craft store.

7. Your child will do things for other people they will never do for you. Like eat. Or sit still.

8. Forget about making phone calls during their waking hours.

9. You don't know stubborn until you've tried to keep a 3 year old away from a cupcake.

10. What worked yesterday will absolutely not work tomorrow. No matter how ingenious.


Happy birthday to my beautiful girl! Every day you make me so proud.

36

I go to the gym five days a week. Most weeks. Some weeks I drop a day and I only make it in four times. Compared to my exercising history, which consisted of a three year membership about ten years ago where I went maybe four times a year, I've been really committed. Every single time I go in, I work out on at least two digitized cardio machines. And every single time I get on one of those machines, I have to punch in my age so it can calculate what my heart rate should be for maximum effect.

I've been typing in 35 for 365 days now. That works out to at least 400 times in the last year that I have been reminded of my age.

Today, I begin typing in a new number. Today, I am 36. Thirty-six. THREE SIX. Honestly, I know that in the grand scheme of things, 36 is not old. I'm not worried about aging. It is what it is. But it is an age that I always saw as grown up. And while I am the married mother of one, I feel anything but grown up. In fact, most of the time, I feel only marginally more prepared to deal with the poop that life's monkeys throw at me than I did when I was 15.

Tonight, I will celebrate my birthday with margaritas and some of the best guacamole Baltimore has to offer. I will laugh and gossip and whine with my girlfriends just like I did when I was 15.

Because, really, who wants to grow up anyway?

Happy Birthday to me 

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Party Hardy Said The Lady

I know you've all been on the edge of your seat wondering how the party went. The short answer is it went well. What I saw of it. I spent the majority of my time between the kitchen and the dining room trying to keep everyone in food and drinks. Occasionally, I poked my head into other rooms and chatted briefly with friends or located my daughter to make sure she wasn't causing too much trouble. I worked on the theory that with all of the other parents and family in the house, not to mention her father, she was probably pretty safe. And she was.

The rain, of course, came. And came. And came. In between monsoons, we got about four minutes out in the back yard on the playgrand before we had to drag the kids back inside. Not the end of the world, but it sure would have been nice to have most everyone in one place, the backyard, rather than spread out all over the house.

Oh yeah, and the cookies? Turned out kind of okay. I never actually ate one, but they all got eaten and people spoke highly of them. It might be because they knew of my angst and were just being nice, but I prefer to think they actually did enjoy them. I wish I had a photo for you, but while they may have tasted good, they did not look good. On the other hand, the cupcakes that I made came out pretty well, if I do say so myself. Of course, Neil asked me what they were. So no one else is confused: they are EYEBALLS. (The orange ones are spider webs.)

So as usual, much of my anxiety was unnecessary. A huge thank you to Katie and Chris for helping me out! Hugs don't even cover how much I appreciate your help. And to everyone that came, bringing smiles and gifts, each and every one is cherished. We are very fortunate, indeed. Our friends and family are such amazing people. They are generous and kind and an awful lot of fun.

Grazi. Gracias. Merci. Danke. Thank you.

Dos, Due, Deux...TWO!

Yesterday was a pretty big day in the Land of Bean. Our little girl turned TWO! At every milestone I say the same thing: where has the time gone. I'll admit, some days it feels like time is creeping by, but in the bigger picture, it's flying. Today was her day and I tried to give her as good of a time as I could.

We began the day with some blueberry pancakes and bacon. I think she gets the bacon gene from her father, they are both fanatical about it.















Followed by a little lounging around, watching some telly. Her lounging skills? From the cats.















We spent the rest of the day doing our normal things: playing, going to the gym, napping (her, not me), cleaning (me, not her), playing, some light shopping to finish up my outfit for the Mobbie shindig, playing, dinner (Qdoba, mmm). And then we had to get ready for the par-tay.

Before we left, Sophie opened a few of her presents. We're having a big birthday bash for her next weekend, but she needed at least a couple of treats on her big day. She got a personalized buffy (butterfly) puzzle from her great aunt Randee and great uncle Steve (and they are great in every sense of the word!) and a rockin' guitar from her Mammom and Grandy, who were kind enough to stay with her while Neil and I abandoned her on her birthday, heartless parents that we are.
















Clearly, she can wail.















That's me and the hubs in a rare photo of the two of us. Neil is doing his let's get this show on the road grimace. He has a really great smile and yet in half of the pictures of him he is making this face. You'd think he was a grump. (He's not.) The award ceremony was fine. Of course, I agonized over what to wear for nothing. There were people there in all manner of dress. I could have gone in jeans. I wouldn't have, but I could've. We were home by nine. We even stopped at McDonald's on the way home to get hot fudge sundaes. Yeah, we're party animals.

PS - Neil sent me an email this morning asking if she looked different now that she's two. I laughed when I read that, but you know what, she does a little.

Tiny Town

I visited the tot lot at one of the area malls yesterday. I hadn't been there before and I wanted to check it out. Okay, really I was there to pick up some lipstick at Sephora, but I legitimized my trip by spending some time in Tiny Town. I've never been to one of these mall play areas before, so I wasn't sure what to expect. I've heard some not so great stuff, but this one is in a nice mall in a nice area, so I figured what the heck.

What the heck, indeed.

When we walked in, there weren't that many kids, so Sophie was able to cavort without too much trouble. However, I must have landed on exactly the wrong time because within minutes the place totally filled up. There were a few kids the same age as Sophie, but most of them were between 3 and 5. Kids between 3 and 5 are WAY rougher than 16 month olds. Where at first I was able to watch her from the sidelines, after the mass arrival I had to stay right next to her because it was like an NFL game out there. Between the steamrolling and clotheslining, it was pretty rough. Luckily, the whole room was padded, so there was little danger of injury, but for this overprotective mama, it was a tad nerve racking.

There was a little person there with her daughter. She was laughing and chasing after her daughter who was giving her as much a run for her money as Sophie was me. We exchanged smiles a number of times. After a little while she asked me how old Sophie was. I told her she was 16 months old. She said "My daughter is the same age!" To which I replied, "Oh, yeah they're about the same size, I mean, height, I mean, ha...ha." And then I ran off.

Why did I have to bring up size when talking to a little person? I don't think I offended her, but let's just say we didn't make plans to meet there next week.

There was a little girl humping the slide. I'm absolutely not kidding. There was a wide padded rail and the girl was straddling it laying down, grinding up against it. She was 3, maybe 4 years old. I am pretty sure she was old enough to know better than to do this in public. I know that some little girls (and maybe little boys, god knows they do when they get older) enjoy rubbing up against things, but isn't one of our jobs as mothers to help them understand that this is not acceptable outside behavior. I wanted to stop her myself and kept looking around for her mama, but couldn't figure out which one she was among the crowd of kids and parents. Yeah, it was uncomfortable.

So there you go. Makeup, midgets and masturbation*. This is how I spent my birthday afternoon. Does it get any better than that?

*Have I just set myself up for some crazy search results or what?

Fat Tuesday

I'm getting ready to go meet with the personal trainer for my strength building session. I'm more than a little nervous. He said I would be sore afterward. I just have to keep telling myself that this* is my goal:















PS. Happy Birthday to me! And Happy Mardi Gras!

Update: My butt is so sore.

*That's me about 10 years ago. I know, right? Look at that stomach! And those thighs!
I want them back!

We're Gonna Party Like It's Your Birthday

Thirty-six years ago today, the world welcomed a new life. Lucky for me. Although I didn't become part of that life until five years ago, my own world is infinitely better for having him in it.



Happy Birthday, my love!

365 Days

At exactly 10:17 am, 365* days ago today, a new life came in to being. After 32 hours and at least that many stitches, our girl had arrived. With one slow blink, she irreversibly wound her way into our hearts. Since that time, we've had ups and downs. And a LOT of messes. We've learned a little bit about parenting but mostly we've learned that everything we thought we knew, we didn't. What follows are just a few of the lessons we've learned in the last year:

- A naked baby is a cute, but dangerous thing.

- Babies, much like cats, love toilet paper.

- Babies will always pick the exact moment that you fall asleep to start crying.

- Never, EVER, wake a sleeping baby.

- A little bit of orange baby food can make a big mess.

- Favorite toys are those not intended to be: water bottles, empty boxes, coasters, etc.

- Babies can sleep through a marching band practicing across the street (true story), but one misplaced foot on the creaky stair brings them fully awake.

- Babies can puke more than seems possible and smile about it.

- Changing a diaper on a plane sucks. Big time.

- Babies have inhumanly strong hands.

- Babies love pooping in a freshly changed diaper.

- You really do forget about the pain of childbirth, but it takes a while.

- Just when you think you're starting to get the hang of things, they change.

- Cuddling a baby is just about the best thing in the whole world.

Happy Birthday, Sophie Bean!!

*Technically speaking, it was 366 days because 2008 was a leap year, but that just doesn't have the same ring to it.