Sunday, May 11, 2008

Mother's Day Top Ten

Top ten reasons I love being a mom:

1. I get to park close to the store. I don't know who thought up those pregnant/moms with infant parking places, but there is a special place in heaven for them. When I see people without kids parking in them I want to key their cars. Is that too harsh?

2. People pay lots of attention to you. People who would ordinarily not even make eye contact with you will come across rooms to talk to you about the baby and to coo at her. Sometimes this isn't necessarily a good thing.

3. I have a built in excuse to get off the phone. Telemarketers beware, that crying baby may have been inspired by a pinch.

4. The reason I'm still, um, round. I will be blaming my ass on the baby until she goes off to college. I certainly can't blame it on my lack of willpower and that rather large piece of lemon meringue pie I had at lunch today. Sha.

5. I get to wear dirty clothes. Who thinks a thing about a young(ish) mother of an infant that has goo of various colors and consistencies on her clothes. No one needs to know that it is actually just a toothpaste stain.

6. My house can be dirty. No one, except my mom, expects my house to be spotless.

7. I can talk to myself when I'm shopping and people will think I'm talking to her. Of course, this occasionally backfires.

8. Since I'm still nursing, I don't have to clean out the litterbox. And haven't since we found out I was pregnant. (Big smiles!)

9. My husband treats me like a queen. He was always good to me, but now that we've created life together
(dunh dunh dunh), it goes to a whole new level. More reasons he's great!

and finally,

10. When my baby smiles at me, it gives me a high no drug can possibly aspire to. Which is a good thing since, as I'm still nursing, I can't drink. Narf.

Happy Mother's Day!!


  1. I hope and it sound like you had a wonderful mothers day

  2. Great list!! And just thinking of pinching my baby so that he'll scream and I can get off the phone is cracking me up...why I didn't come up with that two babies ago is beyond me...

  3. Great list. I especially like the one about people being nice to moms. I am eight months pregnant now and enjoying the kindness of strangers right now. I remember after my son was born, however, on those rare occasions when I left the house alone to do errands . . . I felt disappointed that strangers did not know how fragile I was as a new mother. I contemplated wearing a sign that said, "three weeks post-partum, handle with care." Of course, the fact that I was still wearing maternity pants might have been a clue!


Give me some sugar, baby!