Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Cue The Broken Record

Last Friday I had to take Sophie back for a follow up visit to the pediatrician. She's petite, my little bean, and that has the doctor worried. Me? I go back and forth. On your average day I can tell myself that she is healthy, happy and smart. She's meeting her milestones and is one energetic little thing. Plus, I was a small baby. Heck, I was a small kid. At 11 years old, I was five feet tall and 65 pounds. Think about that for a moment. That means I was just five inches shorter than I am now and roughly 1/3 the weight. (I don't actually weight 195 pounds, but I'm closer to that than to 130, which is double. HUGE sigh.)

But then I go to the doctor and I see the words: Failure To Thrive on Sophie's chart and I lose all my confidence. My eyes fill up and I have a hard time saying all of this to the doctor. The doctor says she just wants to run some tests to make sure there aren't any obvious problems because she has only gained 5 ounces in the last month and she should have gained more like a pound. She wants to make sure there isn't something wrong with her thyroid or anything. She says she would love to send her to a pediatric nutritionist but that the only one in the area is full of kids that are overweight and it would be six months before we could get her in for an appointment.

I hate this. I hate feeling like I need to shove food down my daughter's throat. I hate keeping a journal of everything she eats. I hate trying to find the most calorie-laden food to give her so she gets the biggest bang for her buck. I worry that all of this will have a greater effect on her, that she'll wind up with some sort of eating disorder because I was stuffing her like the witch in Hansel and Gretel.

Mostly, though, I pray that nothing really is wrong with her. That the bullet I feel like I dodged when she came out perfect won't catch me now.

15 comments:

  1. Cara, try not to stress. Where is she on the charts? My daughter was ALWAYS under 5%. Sometimes just at 1. When she was born she gained more weight more quickly than my other two and at about 1 yr old she pretty much stopped and remained at that under 5% mark. Today she's petite and the doc says she won't grow over 5 ft. (where she's at now).

    Sophie looks healthy and happy. She's hitting her milestones, right? I mean, I see her walking in clips you post.

    If they want to test her thyroid, can't they just do a simple blood test? I'm sure everything is going to end up fine and she's just going to be a petite woman. If she looked unhealthy or wasn't eating or was sickly, I'd be concerned, but get the tests out of the way anyhow just to relax your mind. It's gonna be fine.

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  2. Try not to worry! Some kids are just petite and there's nothing wrong w/ that! I'm sure the dr. is just trying to err on the side of caution. She IS gainng weight--kids can't gain the exact same amount! Hang in there--but I don't think anything is wrong!

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  3. I feel for you as I read this post. It gets old, doesn't it? All the journaling, analyzing, worrying. I think its good to check things out, to see if there isn't something that can have a quick fix. And better to look into it earlier than later, so it can get corrected. However my gut feeling is that there is not a thing wrong with her, she's just a little Bean in a big world. Remember, my brother was 13lbs at one year! Now his is a big guy, short but stocky. Try not to worry, its counterproductive and she is SOOOOOOOOOOO healthy in so many ways.

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  4. It's so hard not to worry. Do you like your dr.? If she's making you stress out, maybe you should get a second opinion (and then a different dr??) Sophie DOES seem fine. And dr's have to cover their *ahem* behinds...

    My mom gave me the best baby advice ever, and I'd like to pass it along to you:

    "Listen to everyone that tells you anything about your baby. Then do whatever the hell YOU feel is best."

    YOU are Sophie's mama, and there is SO MUCH validity in mothers' intuition. DO NOT let someone with a piece of parchment hanging on their wall try to bully you. (I know that's not what the doctor is doing, necessarily, but you shouldn't feel bad EVERY time you go see her!!)

    I'm done ranting. Sending you hugs & understanding... =)

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  5. This is one of the sucky parts of being a mom. You worry about everything, even when they saw that it is just a percaution. I can tell you not to wrry but you are going too not matter what. Its because you love her so much and just want the best for her.
    I really think that your doctor is not listening to you and maybe you should get a second opinon. She looks great and not at all like a baby who has failure to thrive.

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  6. I would suggest a 2nd opinion. Infants diagnosed with FTT could be mis-diagnosed based on inaccurate measurements.

    Don't stress ...

    HUGS

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  7. Sometimes I think pediatricians are a little nuts. Both of my boys were in the 3rd percentile for weight for several years and I had to keep going back every month for "weight" checks. And they're fine. They're absolutely fine. There's nothing wrong with having petite kids!

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  8. Hey sweetiepie! It's probably just precautionary. Don't worry too much if you can help it. Have you tried cream cheese sandwiches? I use that pepperidge farm very thin whole wheat bread and flavored cream cheese. Mine scarf 'em down, and they are rather plumping.

    I doubt there's anything developmentally wrong at all, they are just trying to keep it that way.

    (((hugs)) Keep us posted.

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  9. Awww. I'm sorry. Try not to worry. I'm sure she's fine. Fear is not from God...remember that. Have a Happy Thanksgiving!!

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  10. I see so many of my mommy friends fretting over doctor visits such as this, and I wonder if our own mothers were subjected to this, or if all these statistics are just more available now due to computers. I feel like it does more harm than good. I see your pictures and read your stories, and I see nothing but a sweet, healthy kid (guess she's not a baby anymore...) I say that if I ever have a baby, I will not worry about such things, because it will only drive me crazy. But I know that I can't really say that for sure until I live through it. I know that I can only hope to be as good of a mom as you are, and you'll pull through.

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  11. My playgroup mommy friend is having a similar issue with her son. The doctor is making her spread applesauce on his toast or adding this to that to pump up the calories. I can imagine it's frustrating and bothersome to be thinking about it all the time. Funny thing is that her son (just like Sophie) looks perfectly healthy!

    Everything will be okay. You just have a petite girl!

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  12. My son is in the 5th percentile and the doctors have never been concerned about it. As long as he is growing at his rate they are fine with it. I agree with some other folks - get a second opinion. I am sure that she is fine.

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  13. She's FINE. !!! Better than fine, ADORABLE!

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  14. One of my friends went through this about six months ago . . . the low weight, the tests, the worry. The end conclusion was that her daughter is healthy but just on the small side.

    Would you like me to have her email you?

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  15. Oh, I hate that you're troubled by her eating. I hope all goes well at the appointment! My daughters are small too and their picky eating habits don't help...

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Give me some sugar, baby!