A Letter

Dear Women's Clothing Manufacturers,

I recently wrote a letter regarding some concerns of mine to your cohorts in the children's clothing manufacturing industry. I have not heard anything back from them, nor have I seen any changes. I do hope that you will be more responsive to my queries.

First off, what is up with sizes? I find that I am able to wear a three size range. How is this possible? I just don't think the macaroni and cheese I had for lunch can change me that much. Also, I recognize that different materials stretch differently, but as clothing experts, I would think you would be aware of this and compensate. I know there is an acceptable level of variation, but seriously? 2 inches in the waist? Is there any chance of adopting the men's clothing practice of sizing by waist and length? Even just in jeans?

Next, belt loops. Perhaps you are unaware that some women actually use belts for their intended purpose, that is, to hold their pants up. As such, the belt loops should be located evenly around the waistband. However, I find on almost all women's pants there is a surprising dearth of belt loops on the rear side of the pants. Thus, when I cinch my belt up, the belt slips up over the top of the pants leaving an unattractive and uncomfortable gap. All I ask is that you either add a few more belt loops or space them more evenly. If you're uncertain how to do this, please contact the Men's Clothing Manufacturers, they do it right.

I understand that low-rise pants are the rage right now among the younger set and that on a certain (very small) segment of the population, these are a flattering option. However, on anyone larger than a size 6 and older than 25, these low rise pants are ridiculous and uncomfortable. I don't ask for pants that come up to my armpits, but for all that is good and holy, can you please provide me with a reasonable selection of pants that don't require I get a Brazilian bikini wax?

As a woman whose hips are larger than her waist, and I think I'm not alone in this, I have a real problem with the infernal gapping that happens when the waist is too big. This is because the same dimensions are applied to size 0 as to an, ahem, 12. A size 0 has a much smaller waist to hip ratio, while a 12 has a larger one. There seems to be little accommodating for this fact, though. Therefore, in order to find pants that fit my hips, the waist is often way too big. And as much as I adore showing the world my granny panties when I sit down, I would love to not spend half my life hiking up my pants.

Finally, stripes. I think it is fairly well understood that horizontal stripes are not flattering. Why then are such a large percentage of women's shirts this infuriating pattern? And why are they all so dagblasted short? Mama needs coverage!

Okay, I think that's it for now. Thanks, in advance, for your consideration.

Cara